2/23/10 (If you want to share a comment with others, just post below. If you want to send us a comment or message just for us, just put 'personal' somewhere in the subject line. If you would like to receive these discussion posts by email we only need your name and email address – email us the info at jim@saltmagazine.com.)

News from home:

         Sadly, Cindy is back at work. She got a tetanus shot in the hospital when she had Molly (I think the tetanus shot is highly encouraged for her work as a nurse), and left arm has been very sore ever since. She saw an orthopedic doctor today and she has an MRI scheduled. We are praying Cindy does not need surgery or and that God will heal her without medical or surgical intervention regardless. I had my annual physical exam today and all the lab work was normal. Kathleen has had more seizures this year and the doctor keeps adjusting her medication to try to find something that will better control the seizure activity, but Cindy is looking into the modified Atkins diet for seizures.

         Our family health issues, however, are nothing compared with what some of our friends have been going through. There is a very godly family in Michigan, whose daughter got small pox and then strep in the blood, and then she couldn't walk, and then infection in the bone. Anyway, she is walking again, but I understand the medical bill is over $100,000 and they have no insurance.

         Another family we know (we are seeing them regularly, though they live almost 100 miles from us) has had 3 children removed from the home by DFS. They have relatives who are offended at their lifestyle (many children, homeschooling, modest dress, etc.) and they continue to make untrue, unprovable accusations that have caused DFS to engage in a witch hunt to break up the family.

         Finally, my sons relations by marriage have had 7 adopted children removed from the home and they are even facing the possibility of criminal prosecution for things that are hard for us to believe, as we have know this family for a number of years now.

         I can only begin to imagine (something awful, to be sure) what it must be like to have the state lie, cheat and prosecute on unprovable accusations so that one's children are removed from the home. We have know a family or two that had severe problems, but only got support from the state. I do believe a family of agnostic, immodest, time-out, public schoolers are far less likely to have problems with DFS (or whatever it's called in your state) than Christian, modest, corporal discipline, homeschool, courtship families. Many of us are considered crazy by family members. We are considered a social cancer, it would appear, by DFS - a cancer that children should not be allowed to grow up around if possible.

         We had a run in with them in Maryland, which was on a much lower level (no one was threatening to remove children). It ended favorably for us, but the process was humiliating.

         May God protect all believing families who are being torn apart by DFS and their equivalents in other states.

         Our house church had a sad month last month when our only other family decided to attend another church. Thankfully, God has brought another family into our life. We are so grateful that they have traveled so far to see us so many times on Sunday morning. We hope and pray God will give us an enduring friendship. We hope and pray, too, that God will bring us others who will want to mutually encourage one another in the faith.

         God is so good to us. When life is hard or worse it can be hard, as it was for Job, to see God's goodness and providence in our circumstances. But we live by faith and not by sight. God is working all things together for our good if we love God and are called according to His purpose even if DFS comes to our door and removes our children. God will not be mocked. If we are patient, God will destroy his enemies and vindicate us. Vengeance is His and in its time it will come swiftly and with awesome power. Come Lord Jesus!

         - May God watch over your families and love you and your children and grandchildren. - JM

SALT Magazine:

         We are hoping to start a website that will enable Christian/quiverfull/homeschool/courtship families to find each other and to find spouses. We have had some families express interest, so we are hoping it will be a valuable resource to Christian, homeschooling, quiverfull, courtship families. We have no content up yet, but the name is . We are hoping the christianfamilymeetingplace.com site will be up soon. We have technical issues that are being resolved very slowly and I imagine once the site is up it will take us some time to work out the flaws. But we really are making progress.

         We have lowered the price on our book (The Christian Family: In the world, but not of it) from $14.99 to $9.99. We have also lowered the price of Shannon's novel The Last Heir from $13.99 to $11.99. (We charge $2.50 shipping per order not per item.)

         Our last edition of SALT was mailed Friday, Jan. 22. If you want a free issue, please request one by email at jim@saltmagazine.com or request one through our website at www.saltmagazine.com. Pray for us that we will provide spiritually edifying material for our readers. If you are blessed by SALT, please consider subscribing. If you are blessed by the content of SALT and want to subscribe, but can't afford it we will be happy to provide a free subscription as long as God gives us the ability to do so.

         If you want to ask questions, to subscribe or to order with a credit/debit card, email us and if we will be happy to help you. If you want a free issue, just email us a name and mailing address. - JM

ISSUE #1: What is a parent's role in protecting the purity of his children?

         Comments: Thoughts on protecting the purity of your children....

         In as much as the ultimate biblical protection of anyone's purity is marriage.... (ICor.7), then I would surmise that the best protection is to facilitate as much as humanly and prayerfully possible, their lawful gratification of that good aspect of creation. But secondly, and more addressing your actual point about the process of getting them there without failure or regret, it would seem prudent and expedient to micro manage their courtship, and let it be short or move on, and to listen to your gut level intuition about a prospective mate, whether as a father, and as the candidate. I know that micro-management is not the hip concept these days, but it all depends upon whether you wish to be hip or charitable. Your children .... and others.... may cry foul... that you don't "trust them", etc. The simple answer to that is... "Well DUH!" lol No person should be trusted to be completely alone with someone of the opposite sex.... adolescent OR adult. Few Christians who fell went into such arragements planning to defile another's daughter, or to rob the hopes and dreams of their father and mother. The most honorable intentions and protections frequently cloud up and blow away under the onslaught of our carnality, and the person who can't admit this needs to either keep celibate, or remember where liars go. Like one father said to his son who thus objected.... "Son... I wouldn't trust MYSELF in that situation". BUT.....

         The truth is that any prospective couple of any age need time alone. They don't need their dad at all moments sitting between them with his note pad or cam corder. They naturally long to be alone, and you can thank God that they do, because the alternative is revolting. So how can that be done? Alone, but not alone? Well..... how about having them in the swing on the front lawn by themselves, where they can be socially alone, but not inhibited with monitors, so as to communicate more personally, yet preserved from the complete aloneness where the best of convictions can evaporate. Any number of such scenarios could be imagined, and I think it prudent and realistic both. But may God keep us from the... "Yeah, I just met you and I'm trusting you with my daughter for the evening" thing. Perhaps if trust is proven, alone time could be prudently extended, with assuring cell phone calls intermittently made. Sound paranoid? Good. It beats the... "here's my daughter ... have fun" syndrome that has been so destructive to those over whom God has placed us for their good, and for whom we must soon account for. - Charles

         We believe the parents play a huge role (i.e. choosing who is safe for their children/daughters to be around, limiting and/or screening worldly/sexual/provocative influences in their lives, hearts, and minds. Teaching and modeling those behaviors in front of their children. We believe you are honoring your children with your walk. We are trying diligently to honor ours. As we stated to you yesterday, it was not modeled and taught to us as children. So, therefore, God through His Spirit has been doing a good work in us but we have fallen at times and continually try to overcome those failures. - Gena

ISSUE #2: Should Christians be politically involved?

        There are many godly men in the Old and New Testament who were involved in the government of their day. Some shepherded God's people (Moses, David, Hezekiah, Josiah, etc.) and some worked in evil empires (Joseph, Daniel, Mordecai, Cornelius, etc.) It is not wrong, as some believe, to work in the political arena. However, even Christians who work full time in government or politics should understand that their first allegiance is to Christ. Daniel and his friends worked for an evil emperor, but they wouldn't eat the food God had forbidden them, they wouldn't bow down to the idol, and they wouldn't stop praying to their God - though the emperor had commanded these things. We must also understand that good government will not save us. Only God can save us. And we must also understand that evil government will not destroy us if we are his people. In time, the Kingdom of God will be our home and Jesus Christ will rule for all eternity. All all rulers who do not serve Jesus Christ will, themselves, be killed and thrown into the lake of fire prepared for the Devil and his angels.

         Some of us can work full for better government in the here and now and perhaps all of us who have been given the privilege can vote. But we must never lose perspective. We are aliens here and ambassadors for Christ our King. Our hope, our heart, and our first allegiance is with the Kingdom of God

The following is an article from our January 2009 issue of SALT. Care to comment?

HOME MANAGEMENT: GETTING BEYOND THE DETAILS

BY JAMES MCDERMOTT

         There are many - most commonly mothers - who are looking for specific, detailed information on how to manage their home more efficiently. They want to know how to cook, clean, garden, sew, and organize more efficiently. They want to know how to manage their time and money more wisely. They want to figure out how to homeschool all their children and still give them a first rate education. And the answers all contain detailed information on cleaning systems, time charts, budgets, curriculums, horticulture tips, sewing patterns, recipes, and nutritional information.

         There is nothing wrong with being intensely interested in any or all of these things. But I do believe many people get so bogged down with the minutiae of life that they lose all perspective as to what is really important. The Bible says a lot about how we should live our lives, but it says very little about the kind of detailed information many people are looking for to make their households run better. The Scriptures give us principles to live by and define in general terms how different members of the family are to relate to one another. But apparently, we are supposed to figure the details out on our own. And the search for the details drives many mothers to read, listen, and watch for the answers from extra-biblical sources.

         Despite their seemingly best efforts, the answers are elusive to many people. Money may still be insufficient, the day may still be too short to get everything done, the house may still be messy, the children may still be a handful, and over it all the black clouds of discouragement, discontent, and failure may hover. And others achieve a degree of control and order over the minutiae of life, but they are obsessive, difficult, cold, unhappy - and perhaps alone.

         Most of the people who get advice on household management are helped little to none, and most of those who believe they are helped will find out down the road that nothing has really changed. Advice on managing a household is kind of like advice on dieting. There is always a new book, there is always another guru. There is always another system. But a few years from now there will be more books, more gurus, and different systems.

         There is a reason why, even after hundreds of generations of human history involving tens of billions of individuals, no one has written the definitive book on the details of household management. Every human being is incredibly unique. Every husband, every wife, and every child is an original and the mold has been broken. Everyone has different strengths, different weaknesses, different personalities, different tastes, different resources, and different circumstances. Advice that works well for one person will work disastrously for another. It is bold, indeed, to believe that one cleaning system or one homeschooling curriculum will work for all or even most of us.

         Another, more profound challenge is that problems with the details of life are often symptoms of other, deeper issues. I may have character flaws - all of us are sinners and therefore have character flaws – that prevent me from successfully implementing those things that will give me control over the time, people, and money God has entrusted to me. If I am somewhat lazy, or undisciplined, or a gossip, or if I don’t discipline my children, I may have all kinds of problems getting things done.

         And it’s hard to know what is a technical problem, what is a character problem, and what is a little bit of both. If my household income is high, I can be very undisciplined with my money and it is possible that no one (including myself) would ever know I struggle with financial self-discipline. However, if my income is very low, the slightest problem with self-discipline could lead to financial ruin. Likewise, I may have a high metabolism and weigh ten pounds more than I should and people may commend me for being thin, while the person with a very low metabolism who is 25 pounds overweight may have more self-control over his eating though people consider him overweight.

         Which brings us back to the Scriptural approach to household management. The one truly important issue facing us that overshadows all others is whether we are saved by the blood of Christ. If our households run like well-oiled machines and our children are healthy, and happy, and prosperous, it doesn’t do us or our children any good if we are all unsaved. For those of us who are saved, the Scriptures teach us the principles by which we live the Christian life. And the Scriptures judge our hearts and convict us of sin. If we allow it, the Holy Spirit working through the Word will change our hearts over time and help us to overcome the character flaws (besetting sins) that ensnare us.

         As we hearken to the Word of God we will begin to succeed in the weightier things. We will love our spouse and children, discipline our children, and pass on the faith more effectively. We will learn to be content with things that are out of our control and to better handle those things that are in our control - and we will better be able to discern which things are which.

         I believe this: when we listen to God’s Word and implement it in our lives the technical issues of household management - how to manage our time, what homeschooling curriculum to use, how to organize the things in our home, how to manage our money, etc., - will come to us with only a little effort and a willingness to learn. Most of the people who seem to have it all together didn’t struggle with the minutiae of life. It just seemed to come to them.

         When I married Cindy she knew almost nothing about cooking or taking care of babies (She was the youngest child in her family.) When we were married, neither Cindy nor I had known anyone who homeschooled or who had a large family. And I don’t think Cindy would be considered a student of these things. Granted, when Cindy needed to know something, she read a little bit on the subject and then made adjustments as she gained the wisdom that comes from experience. But through hard times and difficult circumstances - which I provided her - she has been an incredible wife and mother. What made Cindy so successful was not her technical skills (though they have steadily improved as the years have passed) but her character. I believe Christian character is far and away the key ingredient to household management success, and I believe those who excel in Christian character will, given time, figure out the rest with relative ease.

         Jesus criticized the Pharisees for straining out gnats and swallowing camels. Their priorities were backwards. As men and women who must manage households, we must make sure our priorities are in order. If we seem to be hitting a brick wall trying to get everything done but we are complacent about our sins, we need to get our priorities straight. Some of us don’t realize it, but we have spiritual flaws and we’re looking for answers in home organization books or a new homeschooling curriculum.

         I do realize there are some who will struggle getting things done through no fault of their own. God has allowed some to experience very, very difficult circumstances. If this is you, I want to encourage you that God knows and He understands. I pray that God will truly give you “the peace that passes all understanding”. No one should feel judged for circumstances beyond his control.

         I do believe, however, that we all need to be introspective and pray, as David did, that God would show us if there is anything wrong with us. We need to be humble enough to look at ourselves soberly and to be teachable. We can and should learn the technical information needed to manage our homes better but we need to expend more time and more effort learning the weightier issues of salvation and Christian character. It may seem to some that their lack of peace is caused by their inability to manage their time, money, and people as well as they should, but this cannot be the case. Our lack of peace is not caused by our overloaded schedule but by our sin which doesn’t sufficiently trust God. A more mature believer can have peace in all kinds of circumstances and through all kinds of difficulties that are far worse than the inability to get everything done we want to get done in a day.

         My prayer for myself and all of you, then, is that we can crucify our flesh and trust God enough to have peace in the midst of a chaotic world. I pray that God will give us the knowledge and strength to change those things in our lives that need to be changed, the peace and contentment to leave in God’s hands those things in our lives that are beyond our control, and the wisdom to know the difference. And finally, I pray that all of us can move beyond the details of household management to the larger issues of salvation and Christian character which are absolutely foundational to successful household management and everything else in life.

©2009 SALT Magazine, 2131 W. Republic Rd. #177, Springfield, MO 65807, www. saltmagazine.com

OLD POLLS: (Feel free to comment on polls.) (Right and wrong is not a popularity contest. Polls do not prove right or wrong - only God's word does that. Polls are interesting and informative because they let us know what people are thinking.)

         Do you think it improper for single young men and women to be dancing together (perhaps the Virginia Reel, English Country dances, square dancing, etc.)? Yes (25%), No (75%).

         Comment on Poll: When I was a young lady I square danced a lot. I think it is very acceptable fun. Our children have participated in square dancing at a local festival the last couple years. They have enjoyed it greatly. For the most part, only parts that touch are hands. What is more important than the activity is the clothing worn during these events. There is a misnomer in our society that says "if all parts are covered it is modest." This is false. We have been in a church where the pastor's wife was the biggest culprit. If the clothes are so tight that nothing is left to the imagination, they are not modest.

         NEW POLL: (vote NOW! at www.saltmagazine.com)

         When should women be required to wear a head covering? Never? When they pray or prophesy publicly? When the church meets? It should be something she puts on every day?

SALT Magazine Deals: 12 semi-monthly issues for $24. Sign up a friend for free. Or, 6 issues for $15. Send check to: SALT, 2131 W. Republic Rd. #177, Springfield, MO 65807. Or, order online at: www.saltmagazine.com

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12/31/09 (If you want to share a comment with others, just send a reply to jim@saltmagazine.com or post below. If you want to send us a comment or message just for us, just put 'personal' somewhere in the subject line. If you would like to receive these discussion posts by email we only need your name and email address – email us the info at jim@saltmagazine.com.)

News from home:

      Molly and Cindy are doing well.

       Kathleen has been having more seizures lately. (In case you don't know, Kathleen has had seizures since she was three. She is now 16.) The doctor is in the process of weaning her off one medication and introducing a new one. We've been through this countless times before. Good results aren't guaranteed and when they are good the effect eventually wears off. Please pray for her. She's a very sweet girl.

       John has been offered a job in a C.P.A. firm in N. Arkansas about a 2 hr. 20 min. drive from us. He intends to mover there and come home on weekends. He's supposed to start sometime in January.

       We've had difficulty getting our new courtship website up, but we hope to have it online in a couple of weeks (christianfamilymeetingplace.com). We continue to pray for us and for all the other families who want their children to find godly spouses and to remain pure during the courtship process, but who don't have any good prospects amongst the people they know personally. Trying to find spouses amongst strangers - even strangers who hold similar beliefs - is a risky thing for our children. But sometimes - Abraham is an example - we are forced to take risks.

       I am motivated to do find like-minded individuals/families for our church fellowship - which has been us and one other family that past year or two. If you know of anyone near Springfield, MO who might be interested in meeting with us, let us know.

       We will try very hard to have the next edition of SALT out in mid January.

       We hope and pray that God is doing a great work in your family. - JM

SALT Magazine:

       We are hoping to start a website that will enable Christian/quiverfull/homeschool/courtship families to find each other and to find spouses. We have no content up yet, but the name is christianfamilymeetingplace.com. We are hoping the site will be up by the time our next issue of SALT is released in mid-January.

       We have lowered the price on our book (The Christian Family: In the world, but not of it) from $14.99 to $9.99. We have also lowered the price of Shannon's novel The Last Heir from $13.99 to $11.99. (We charge $2.50 shipping per order not per item.)

       Our last edition of SALT was mailed Wednesday, November 11. We don't have any copies of that edition left, but if you want a free copy of our next edition please request one by email at jim@saltmagazine.com or request one through our website at www.saltmagazine.com. Pray for us that we will provide spiritually edifying material for our readers. If you are blessed by SALT, please consider subscribing. If you are blessed by the content of SALT and want to subscribe, but can't afford it we will be happy to provide a free subscription as long as God gives us the ability to do so.

       We are planning to write an e-book on our homeschooling methodology, which we hope will be available by the end of February (Sorry about the delay, I've been sick). Our next book is likely to be a book on courtship. We are hoping that will be out at the end of May.

        If you would like speakers for your homeschool group or church fellowship let us know.

       If you want to ask questions, to subscribe or to order with a credit/debit card, email us and if we will be happy to help you. If you want a free issue, just email us a name and mailing address. - JM

ISSUE #1: Does it matter how much I weigh?

       My older sister has said that gluttony is the acceptable Christian vice. A person who smokes or drinks - even if he drinks in moderation - will suffer the disapproval of his fellow Christians. But a gluttonous person - unless he is truly obese - will rarely suffer the same kind of disapproval.

       But it is the same sin in another form. It is the lack of self control to the harm of our bodies. The Scriptures say, "Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body. (1 Cor. 6:19-200 "So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God." (1 Cor. 10:31)

       We are blessed to live in a time and place where food is so abundant that even people considered poor are often overweight. Being overweight makes us less productive and will generally shorten our life span. Christ did, indeed, declare all foods clean, but we are still need to control our bodies, which desire things that aren't good for us.

ISSUE #2: What is a parent's role in protecting the purity of his children?

(Care to Comment?)

The following is an article from our January 2009 issue of SALT. Care to comment?

DO HARD THINGS: THE HARDEST ARE THE MOST BASIC

by James McDermott

       My children have been reading a good book by Alex and Brett Harris entitled “Do Hard Things”. The book challenges teens not to waste their youth, but instead to do hard things that will maximize their impact for Christ.

       I am all for teens – and everyone else, for that matter – thinking big and working hard to accomplish great things for God. Alex and Bret Harris recommend starting a ministry, a business, or looking for opportunities to help people in need. I pray that teens generally and my older children specifically will heed the message of this book and strive to make the most of this one short life God has given them.

       However, the message of doing hard things can be dangerous if taken out of context or if given too high a priority. There is another step – a harder one to accomplish, I believe – that must come first to ensure that doing hard things is worth the effort. That step is to crucify our flesh – to do all we can to eliminate selfish ambition, to control our bodies, to be content, to trust God in all things, and to love even our enemies.

       How many pastors, evangelists, and Christian entertainers have reached the place where hundreds, thousands, or even millions of people were listening to their message, only to be brought down by scandal? How much damage to the gospel of Christ has been done by those who reached the place of high impact only to find they weren’t ready? Remember Jimmy Swaggart and Jim Bakker? Remember Amy Grant? Remember Sandi Patti? Have you known pastors who were guilty of adultery or theft? I have. It is true that God will forgive all of them for their sins if they repent, but perhaps it is also true that some of these have done much more to hinder the gospel than they have done to help.

       My theory on doing the hard things is that it is more important to be the man God wants me to be than it is to be in the place God wants me to be. I have found in my own life that as I become the man God wants me to be I am more likely to be where God wants me to be anyway – and I’m less likely to make a mess of things once I’m there. It is relatively easy to make the decision to be a pastor, teacher, evangelist, missionary, movie maker, ministry founder, book writer, media personality, entertainer, etc., but it is very hard to crucify our flesh to the point where God can use us effectively and we can withstand Satanic temptation and opposition.

       The Scriptures tell us that not many of us should presume to be teachers because God will judge teachers more strictly. Jesus had many disciples, but only 12 were called to be Apostles. The church at Antioch was on fire for Christ, but only Paul and Barnabbas were set apart initially for the missionary work we are so familiar with in the book of Acts. Could it be that God doesn’t call most of us to high profile, high impact ministry?

       Paul does talk about the Christian life in military and athletic terms. We are to strain to run a good race. We are to arm ourselves for spiritual battle. From these verses we might conclude that the Christian life is all about doing hard things. But Paul also tells us to make it our ambition to lead a quiet life and to work with our hands. He tells us to be content in the place we are at when we came to believe – even in slavery. Peter tells us that a quiet and gentle spirit is of great worth in the eyes of God. Jesus tells us not to be anxious about anything – that His yoke is light and His burden easy. Apparently the struggle and battle of the Christian life may not be directly about our work. Otherwise, Paul would be contradicting himself when he told us to make it our ambition to lead a quiet life and work with our hands.

       There is a potential danger, then, in calling all young Christians to do hard things. First, they may not all be called to do hard things. And if they are called, they may not all be ready. Second, the call to do hard things may lead some to be discontented with the life most people are called to live: to work hard at an ordinary job, to marry, and to raise children.

       Those of us who are older know that these things – which may seem boring, low-impact, and lacking challenge to ambitious young people who are chomping at the bit to do great things for God – are difficult and consequential. Indeed, every man who works outside the home is God’s missionary and ambassador to every unbeliever his life touches. In his conversation, he must find the right balance of salt and grace, and in his deeds he must be holy before God even as he loves those he comes in contact with. In his marriage he must be the head, even as he loves his wife as Christ loved the church. He must raise godly children in a culture that is saturated in sin. Satan is looking to devour our children, so parents must be vigilant. We have a potential impact on everyone we work with, everyone we get to know while running errands, every person in our extended family, and especially on every child we raise. And we may impact others indirectly through those we come into contact with and we will impact indirectly everyone our children, grandchildren, and great children come into contact with. If we are especially godly, the impact of a “normal” life is hard to overestimate. If we are less sanctified, we may have very little impact or, worse, do more harm than good.

       Our leaders in Christ are to prepare us for ministry, which for most of us will be a ministry in the spiritual trenches of everyday life. How many of our leaders, having chosen at a tender age to pursue a life of ministry, have no clue what it takes to live out the Christian life in the world most people live in? Young people who go directly from being children and students to high impact ministry may be naive, incompetent, presumptuous, and lacking wisdom. Shouldn’t the majority of our leaders come from the ranks of those who have successfully represented Christ in their work, their marriages, and in their child rearing? Shouldn’t those who hold positions of great impact first be tested in positions of lesser impact?

       Christ told us to humble ourselves. We are not to exalt ourselves, but to let God exalt us. Some of us are running ahead of God and trying to do hard things as if the fate of the universe depended on us. The greatest Christians I know were crushed by God before they were counted worthy to serve in an area of high impact. I fear some of our most zealous young people are presumptuously trying to skip the character molding that will make them successful in their work for the Kingdom. Think of Abraham, who was made to wait until he was 100 before Isaac was born. Think of Moses, who was made to wait 40 years in the wilderness and work as a shepherd, husband, and father before he was called to lead the people of Israel out of Egypt. Think of David, who for years after he was anointed king was pursued as a fugitive. He was constantly on the run and often one step away from death before God gave him the kingdom. Think of the Apostles who were already working a trade before they were called to be Apostles. And even then it took roughly three years of training from Christ Himself before God was ready to use them fully. Think of Paul, who had to wait many years between his conversion and his ministry in Antioch, his missionary journeys, and his writing of the Scriptures. Even Jesus worked in relative anonymity before He began His ministry at age 30.

       I hope I will not be misunderstood. God does occasionally call people to influential, high profile work for the Kingdom. And occasionally He calls young people to such work. But I think our weakness today is not the lack of people willing to work full-time for the Kingdom. Rather, our weakness is a lack of people willing to live as living sacrifices for Christ in their everyday lives. We need a more humble, sanctified, Spirit-filled, flesh-crucified people. And I am convinced that such people will have more impact for the Kingdom of God in their ordinary lives than a less sanctified person will have in a so-called position of influence and impact. And I am convinced that God Himself will raise up those who humbly and lovingly serve. I am reminded of the Scripture that says the one who would be great must be the servant of all. That is the hard thing I want my children to aspire to.

       We need to find a balance between complacency – a real problem the authors of “Do Hard Things” addressed – and presumption. We don’t want to lag behind God and we don’t want to run ahead of Him either. Our desire is to be at the center of His will wherever that will take us. For most of us, that will mean working in relative anonymity, marrying, and raising children – and that’s better than OK. Serving God in this way is very, very consequential. It is very, very important. Some of us will have a more public ministry. But we are all working as a team for the same purpose. We are interdependent, or rather we are all dependent on God for every good thing we have or do.

       My advice to young people: Work on being the person God wants you to be, bloom where you are planted, serve where you have the opportunity. This is the really hard thing. If you are faithful here, God will show you where you should labor for the Kingdom and you will have peace and joy as you work – even if you suffer for Christ.

©2009 SALT Magazine, 2131 W. Republic Rd. #177, Springfield, MO 65807,

www.saltmagazine.com

OLD POLLS: (Feel free to comment on polls.) (Right and wrong is not a popularity contest. Polls do not prove right or wrong - only God's word does that. Polls are interesting and informative because they let us know what people are thinking.)

       Do you give your children an allowance? Yes (36%) No (64%) Comment?

       Comment on poll: Though we give our children an allowance, it is dependent upon satisfactory completion of their chores. The chores are their responsibility whether we are able to give them an allowance or not, but if they haven't met their responsibility for the week they must do their chores AND forego their allowance. - anonymous

       Comment on poll: We used to give our children an allowance and since we have stopped. It is not a right or wrong issue. The Bible neither commands nor forbids it. We couldn't afford it.

       Our children all work and we take care of them. If they want something more, they can work for it themselves - which can be a good wisdom and character builder.

NEW POLL (vote NOW! at www.saltmagazine.com):

Do you like the idea of "children's church"? Yes? No? Comment?

SALT Magazine Deals: 12 semi-monthly issues for $24. Sign up a friend for free. Or, 6 issues for $15. Send check to: SALT, 2131 W. Republic Rd. #177, Springfield, MO 65807. Or, order online at: www.saltmagazine.com

To get 1 free issue with no obligation to subscribe: Just send us your name and a mailing address.

Speaking: If you want a speaker for your homeschool group or church function next spring? email us at speaking@saltmagazine.com.

Donate: (Only if God moves your heart to cheerfully support this ministry) mail a check to SALT Magazine, 2131 W. Republic Rd. #177, Springfield, MO 65807. Or, subscribe by Visa or MasterCard at www.saltmagazine.com

SALT now has a TOLL FREE NUMBER: 1-888-883-8593, if you want to ask questions, to subscribe or to order with a credit/debit card.

11/13/09 (If you or anyone you know wants to receive these discussion posts by email, we need only the name and email address. Comments, whether emailed to us or posted below, will be sent out with the email discussion posts as well as appear below this post. If you want to send us a comment or message just for us, just put 'personal' somewhere in the subject line. Sign up or comment at jim@saltmagazine.com.)

News from home:

Cindy is now over 38 weeks along. We're getting REALLY, REALLY excited! Cindy has never made it to her due date. Her range is 30 days early to 2 days early and today she is 12 days away. We don't know if we're having a boy or a girl - which is customary for us.

Our 5th child turned 18 yesterday. Does time fly or what?

I'm sorry about SALT Magazine being late. It was mailed on Wednesday the 11^th. We will try very hard to have the next one out in 2 months (Jan.12).

I did apply for a pastor's position and they called back even after reading our website. Of course, nothing came of it - which I think now is a good thing. Our lives have been about being open to taking the road less traveled, hopefully only when it was in accordance with God's will. I don't think it wrong to be a church pastor, but it would have been returning from whence we came and I'm not sure that is what God wants for us. However, my current job still seems a bit tentative and I'm still looking.

Our oldest continues to hang on at his place of work. When he started there were 3 in the IT department. Now, he is the only one. Our next son got a master's degree in accounting (magna cum laude) this year and has passed 3 of the 4 tests so far required to become a C.P.A. (he's still waiting on the results of the 4th test). However, he is having difficulty getting even an interview. It's a hard time for the inexperienced to be looking for work. If you could pray for him, we'd appreciate it.

The courtship issue continues to be on my mind as we do have children who are ready but for godly spouses! Courtship/betrothal is a fascinating subject to me. There is no accepted way of doing things. Everyone does what is right in their own eyes and that may be very different from one family to the next. The other interesting thing is how isolated families handle courtship when the children are getting older and no spouses are seen on the horizon. Some isolated families had dreams of having their married children round about them, but they wonder whether their children will have to marry someone far away to marry at all.

Please pray for Cindy and the baby. We hope and pray that God will continue to be with you and your family. Write to us and let us know how you're doing. -- JM

SALT Magazine:

We are hoping to start a website that will enable Christian/quiverfull/homeschool/courtship families to find each other and to find spouses. We have no content up yet, but the name is christianfamilymeetingplace.com. We are hoping the site will be up at the end of November.

Our newest edition of SALT is was mailed on Wednesday, November 11. If you would like a free issue, please request one by email at jim@saltmagazine.com or request one through our website at www.saltmagazine.com. Pray for us that we will provide spiritually edifying material for our readers. If you are blessed by SALT, please consider subscribing.

We are planning to write an e-book on our homeschooling methodology, which we hope will be available by the end of January (Sorry about the delay). Our next book is likely to be a book on courtship. We are hoping that will be out at the end of April.

If you would like speakers for your homeschool group or church fellowship let us know.

If you want to ask questions, to subscribe or to order with a credit/debit card, email us and if we will be happy to help you. If you want a free issue, just email us a name and mailing address. - JM

ISSUE #1

What should adult unmarried girls who want to be married be doing with their lives?

The one right answer is that they should be following God's will for their lives, but God's will for every girl is different. God made every girl unique and placed her in different circumstances. And girls, in a way, need to be more flexible than boys. A boy usually has an occupational direction set before the right girl comes along, but the girl may marry a doctor or a farmer, an accountant or a car mechanic, a missionary or an entrepreneur. She must be in tune with that still small voice (the Spirit) that tells her to go to the right or to the left, and she must be patient for she doesn't know whether the right boy is coming along today or 5 years from now.

Specifically, what she should now do depends on her gifts, opportunities, and circumstances. If she is the oldest in a large family or if she has a disabled parent or grandparent at home there may be enough work at home to keep her productive. If she has more time she can help with the church fellowship or develop talents that she will use later on. If she is emulating the Proverbs 31 woman, she may be enterprising as well. Remember, the wife of noble character in Proverbs 31 sold her merchandise to the merchants, traded profitably, and bought property.

I also believe that a girl who wants to get married should do what she can to come in contact with godly young men of marriageable age. We work for food even though God has promised to provide all we need, so I don't see a problem with a girl putting herself in a position to be found. It's just that this positioning must be done with confidence and faith and not in fear or desperation.

(Care to Comment?)

ISSUE #2

Should the current economic environment keep Christians from marrying or having children?

(Care to Comment?)

The following is an article from our July 2009 issue of SALT. Care to comment?

A DAY IN THE LIFE

By Cindy McDermott

      I was watching my daughter make pancakes the other day for breakfast. (A much more popular dish, I may add, than the hot rice we often eat.) She was working along when the griddle began teetering. Nonchalantly, Heather righted it and returned to flipping pancakes.

      It was then I remembered that a few days prior one of the children brought me a piece of heavy white plastic they had found in the kitchen. “Looks like a leg to the griddle,” I commented. Indeed, it was.

      Heather is able to so nonchalantly balance – flip – balance – flip in succession because, unfortunately, such things are not rare in our home. Our griddle bears a striking resemblance to one of my crockpots, which also exists three-legged. And while they lack a leg to stand on, many of my pots lack handles. Our home was founded with many of these pots (i.e., wedding gifts), so I guess six moves, cross country treks, and twenty-three plus years will take their toll. Hopefully, I don’t look so worse for the wear after twenty-three years!

      So I guess I can give a pass to the pots, but then there’s the other matter of our cups. I shudder to think of how many glasses have been shattered and how many mugs have lost their handles over the years . One of our daughters has become particularly known for breaking way more than her fair share. She has gradually gotten better, but back when this was a regular occurrence she just couldn’t seem to believe she broke the cups. There she would be, standing amid the broken glass, looking at us incredulously when we asked her what happened. “But I didn’t do anything!” she would reply. (Except for the time when she admitted she was trying to see how many cups she could carry at once.) But that was her usual response. The joke became that when glasses saw her coming, they would jump off the counter by themselves in self-defense!

      We have also gone through an inordinate amount of vacuum cleaners. The first one we had in our married life lasted a very long time. But then we started going through one after the other. We finally figured out that this increase started just at the same time we began allowing children to vacuum the carpets. There was a direct correlation between how quickly we bought the cleaners and how young the population of the sweepers. It is now required in our household that you carry a vacuum cleaner driver’s permit before you can sweep the carpets, and that is based primarily on age. This is of great disappointment to the older children, who don’t really want to do all the vacuuming. It is also of great disappointment to the younger children, who really do want to do most of the vacuuming. It seems the only ones who aren’t disappointed over this policy are Jim and I, who can now take that extra money and put it toward other things – like cups.

      Yes, this new policy has worked rather well for us, except for the occasional sock that gets sucked up or the the dental floss that gets twisted around the brush. Just don’t ask me about the dental floss, though, because I don’t understand it, either.

      Probably the most fresh, raw, painful wound we face right now is our plumbing. This house of ours that we have now owned for five years sports three new toilets, miles (it seems) of new pipes under the house, new faucets in one bathroom, a new shower doo-dad, and what you would think by now would be the cleanest pipes in town. Eric the plumber (I like to call him our plumber) has been there for us, patiently doing some really nasty jobs. We’re starting to learn the signs, now, and we know that when the downstairs toilet or kitchen sink gurgles when the upstairs toilet flushes, we’re headed for trouble. If our snake doesn’t do the trick and then the washing machine backs up, we know the clog is back big-time. Actually, a new clog in the same old place. We tend to get lovely grease clogs in the low spot of the house pipes heading out to the city pipes. We’ve instructed our children time and again about cooking, dishwashing, and dealing with grease but it remains a recurrent problem. But I guess Eric’s kids need to eat, too. (“Steak tonight, kids – I just worked for the McDermotts!”)

      I guess the joke is that you can fix anything with duct tape. That is not our personal fixer of choice, however. Ours is superglue. We have tried, it seems, just about every kind they make. Who knew that it came in so many forms? Gel, liquid. Apply it by the drop, the brush, the applicator. Now if they can only figure out how to keep the cap from being stuck to the tube!

      The clincher for Jim and I, though, is that we just don’t remember things being like this when we grew up. I remember my dad doing fix-it jobs around the house, but I don’t remember water cascading to the first floor from the upstairs shower, the plumber putting on boots to wade through the sewage under the house, or vacuum cleaners and glasses being broken in rapid succession. But all those things are a part of a day in my life now. Maybe some of it is the function of a lot of people at home most of the day in an older house. Maybe some of it is the end result of decisions made over the years – the understanding that decisions made (some noble, some just honest mistakes) will affect your life for time to come.

      But at the same time I think it’s much bigger than all that. God’s providence reigns and things are ultimately worked or allowed by His hands. My small life is part of a much bigger plan, a part of a much more noble purpose – God’s. I am reminded of Tevye singing about what it would be like to be rich in the movie “Fiddler on the Roof”. He ends by asking God, “Would it spoil some vast, eternal plan, if I were a wealthy man?” Well, maybe it just might! We know so little. Our insight and outward view are so limited. So the details of my life, the ones that can frustrate me, give me joy, or inconvenience and annoy me, may just be part of God’s vast and eternal plan. Who am I to say? I am here to be His servant, to allow Him to work in me – molding me to make me capable of the work He has for me to do, working through my life as He sees fit. And so I ask God to give me wisdom. I beseech Him to open my eyes so that I don’t miss anything. I petition God that my reactions to events and the decisions I make fit into His perfect plan. I must lose my life in order to save it. Christ died for me that I should no longer live for myself, but for Him who died for me and was raised again. “So you also, when you have done everything you were told to do, should say, ‘We are unworthy servants; we have only done our duty.’ ” (Luke 17)

      And the lessons He teaches me! He has taught me that in life there are a few things that are very, very important, but most things aren’t. So many of the things we seek after or worry over or spend our time on are not significant. And that’s because they are not eternal. We are to “fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.” (2 Corinthians 4:18) We get distracted from our heavenly calling because we are too concerned about that which is fleeting.

      Because He is teaching me to have an eternal perspective, I am learning to be content. I can be satisfied with my life because my needs are met and because I am here for a higher purpose than just pleasing myself. I can be content because of the great promises God has given me – that He will provide my daily bread and never forsake me. I can be content because God is forever on the throne, and He loves me. I can be content because my happiness should rest in God, and not in the circumstances in which I find myself.

      I know that many people would look at a day in my life and trace it all back to the children, as if it’s some horrible thing I brought on myself. But there are no regrets, just a grateful heart towards God. I will gladly pay the plumber, buy the vacuum cleaner, pick up the broken glass, search for the keys the toddler just had, ignore the stained carpet for another year, eat casseroles, spend a fortune in laundry soap, and buck the culture at each and every turn, all for the privilege and joy of having my children. They are the only things I touch in my house that will last forever. How wonderful God has been to me: giving me an eternal work within the walls of my home, with a whole lot of love and laughter and joy thrown in.

©2009 SALT Magazine, 2131 W. Republic Rd. #177, Springfield, MO 65807, www.saltmagazine.com

OLD POLLS:

(Feel free to comment on polls.) (Right and wrong is not a popularity contest. Polls do not prove right or wrong - only God's word does that. Polls are interesting and informative because they let us know what people are thinking.)

Are we Christians supposed to be tithing (giving 10% of our income to the work of the church, to the poor, etc.)?

Comment on poll: I could be wrong, but I believe the command to tithe was part of the Old Covenant. I know Jesus told the Pharisees they were right to tithe their mint and dill, but that, too, was before the New Covenant was put in effect. I can't find any Scripture post the resurrection of Christ where we are commanded to give 10%. Instead, Paul writes, "Each man should give what he has decided in his heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver." (2 Cor. 9:7) If we give simply because we are commanded to give we are giving under compulsion. Under the Old Covenant each man couldn't really decide in his heart how much to give and he had to give his tithe no matter how reluctantly and uncheerfully he gave it.

However, that does not mean that New Covenant believers shouldn't give to support the work of the church. We read that the early disciples sold possessions and goods, land and houses and gave it to the Apostles. They didn't consider anything to be their own. (Acts 2-4) We read of the Macedonian church, "Out of the most severe trial, their overflowing joy and their extreme poverty welled up in rich generosity. 3For I testify that they gave as much as they were able, and even beyond their ability. Entirely on their own, 4they urgently pleaded with us for the privilege of sharing in this service to the saints." (2 Cor. 8:2-4)

If we were pleading for the opportunity to give, if we - even in our poverty - gave beyond our ability, if we sold lands, houses, goods, and possessions because we considered nothing our own, we wouldn't be worried about a tithe.

NEW POLL (vote NOW! at www.saltmagazine.com):

Do you encourage your children to marry someone who lives close to home? Yes? No? Comment?

SALT Magazine Deals: 12 semi-monthly issues for $24. Sign up a friend for free. Or, 6 issues for $15. Send check to: SALT, 2131 W. Republic Rd. #177, Springfield, MO 65807. Or, order online at: www.saltmagazine.com

To get 1 free issue with no obligation to subscribe: Just send us your name and a mailing address.

Speaking: If you want a speaker for your homeschool group or church function next spring? email us at speaking@saltmagazine.com.

Donate: (Only if God moves your heart to cheerfully support this ministry) mail a check to SALT Magazine, 2131 W. Republic Rd. #177, Springfield, MO 65807. Or, subscribe by Visa or MasterCard at www.saltmagazine.com

SALT now has a TOLL FREE NUMBER 1-888-883-8593 if you want to ask questions, to subscribe or to order with a credit/debit card.

9/7/09 (If you want to share a comment, click 'comment' listed below or type in the comment box at the end of this post. If you want to send a comment or message just for us, send an email to jim@saltmagazine.com and put the word 'personal' somewhere in the subject line. If you would like to receive these discussion posts, we only need your name and email address.)

(Inside: News from Home, News from SALT, Issue#1 and #2, Article: Isolation, Polls.)